My Mum's half Swedish so...

It was as I was reading my Euro 2004 pundit's latest comment -

"I will take this opportunity to say that Sven needs his bumps felt. He's talking about starting with the same line-up for the match against Croatia. How many times do I have to say that Michael Owen couldn't hit a cow's arse with a banjo."

- that I cheered Ibrahimovic's Keystone Kops-style backheel goal take Italy to a 1-1 draw. The phrase 'goalmouth scramble' was never more appropriate.